We all have insecurities; many of us hide them behind a facade of confidence and arrogance, while others can’t. I have many insecurities that often hold me back from embracing opportunities that knock on my door. I could be enjoying my day, but the moment I meet someone I feel is more confident than me, I question everything about myself.
It’s easy to get thrown off your game by insecurities and self-doubt. Whether in a social setting or a workplace setting, some people want everyone to feel inferior to them.
Insecurities, for some, are just a way to protect themselves from feeling inferior. Making others feel less than them makes some people feel better about themselves. In my case, I know I’m a confident person, but the other person’s insecurities show up as arrogance that makes me feel not so confident.
Now imagine how amazing it could be if you knew that! If you knew that the person feeling superior was just hiding behind their insecurities? What if you know how to deal with an insecure person?
Before I take you to the ways you can deal with an insecure person, let me walk you through the signs of an insecure person, first.
Signs of an Insecure Person
People with insecurities are not that hard to spot. While some insecure people can be mean and rude, some choose to be toxic in subtle ways. Here are some signs of an insecure person you should know;
- They Care About Others’ Opinions, Very Much
An insecure person always cares more about what others think of them. They seek external validation and approval constantly, and always worry about their image in the eyes of others.
- They Never Express Themselves
Insecure people don’t always express themselves – their feelings or their thoughts. They are driven by a fear of judgment or rejection, and this holds them back from expressing their opinions, even when they have something of value to contribute.
- They Can’t Make Decisions
Another sign of an insecure person is that they can’t make decisions by themselves. They always doubt their judgment and fear making mistakes. This causes them to delay or rely on others to make their decisions.
- They Change Topics They Don’t Know Anything About
If you want to know how to spot an insecure person, just notice how a person changes topics they don’t know much about. Insecure people do that. They feel uncomfortable admitting their lack of knowledge on certain topics, so they steer a conversation toward a more comfortable one.
Insecure people, to make themselves feel better, often put others down. They often verbally attack other people by pointing out their flaws and mistakes. They believe that doing so will increase their self-worth and mask their insecurities.
- Their Talk is Louder Than Their Actions
Another sign of an insecure person is that they talk big, but fail to follow through with their actions. They make big promises and boast about their accomplishments, but their actions don’t often align with their words.
Lastly, insecure people are paranoid about others’ intentions. They assume that people talk behind their backs or have ulterior motives. This paranoia comes from their lack of self-confidence and trust.
How to Deal With Insecure People?
Insecure people are everywhere. From your neighbor to your dearest friend and from your partner to your boss, so it’s important to know how to deal with insecure people without letting yourself fall into their trap.
Finding out the cause of their insecurity can be the first step. Listen to them and understand their experiences, fears, and triggers. Knowing this can help you approach them and the situation better – with empathy and support to help them, too.
Never fail to be compassionate and empathetic when dealing with insecure people. Acknowledge their feelings and validate them with reassurances. Let them know that having insecurities doesn’t make them less than others, and you’re there to help them through it.
- Be Confident in Your Communication
When you’re interacting with an insecure person, keep calm and be confident in your communication style. Speak clearly and be assertive. Do not be aggressive. Your confidence might offer the insecure person a sense of security. Your goal should be to help them ease their anxieties, so be calm.
Insecure people are just hurt inside, so be respectful towards them, regardless of their actions. Do not belittle them or dismiss their concerns. Show respect for them and see how your small action helps them build their self-esteem and encourages them to be more open with you.
- Offer Constructive Feedback
When talking to an insecure person, be constructive in your feedback. Focus on their strengths and achievements, but don’t be overly critical of them. This can help them see that they are heard and understood.
While I encourage you to be supportive, I also advise you to set healthy boundaries. Make sure that the insecure person’s insecurities negatively impact you. If you feel that their negativity is harming them and you, suggest that they seek professional help. If you’re negatively affected by others’ insecurities, then you can also speak to a professional for support.
Wrapping Up…
Knowing the signs of an insecure person can help you shake off the seeds of doubt and inferiority they are projecting onto you. Learn to take the high road by being compassionate and understanding of insecure people around you. Don’t give in to the doubts others plant in your mind, but believe in yourself.
When you allow others to project their insecurities onto you, you allow them to bring your confidence down and shake your self-belief. Don’t let others hold you down from doing your best!
Do you have an insecure person around you? How do you deal with insecure people? Let us know your tips and hacks in the comments below.
Take Care!
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